The two daughters of the Duke of York (Tim Wallers), Eugenie (Eliza Butterworth) and Beatrice (Jenny Rainsford) are trying to help their daddy, Andrew, out of the situation called Noncegate here.  Toe sucking Fergie is played by the magnificent Sophie-Louise Dann, working in America as a maid for Harry and Mahgen (no-one can get her name right). 

The scriptwriters obviously update the play daily as the night I saw, news of Andrew being sued in America had only just hit the headlines.  Acting as narrator is Prince Edward (Matthew Cottle) who also pops up as assorted footmen and butlers.  He encourages us to heckle Camilla with shouting the line,  “You’ve only Got One O Level”.  Sadly no-one has recorded what subject this was in, I long to find out if it was PE, Embroidery or Metal work.  If you don’t understand O Level it’s GCSE grade A to C for anyone born after 1970.

Charles decides that he wants to be an absolute monarch and takes the country back to 1173. That is when he isn’t doing a Gollum impression with the authentic looking crown.  Wills and Kate are exiled or sent on a world song and dance tour while Camilla gets 1173 wrong and instead of a wimple, dresses as the 1573 Virgin Queen, Elizabeth I.  Meanwhile Harry and Moggin practise chanting her mantra. 

Act One closes with a magnificently sung number from the whole cast. 

Act Two opens with Mogan strapped to a medieval torture wheel presumably by power hungry Camilla. We see Harry and Wills unite to rescue Maggin and Kate and she puts their differences aside about who made whom cry over the bridesmaid’s dress.

The Windsors is more low comedy than high but the royal accents and curiously sounding vowels are a delight. Harry and Mogan have real lookalikes here. Forget that Kate Middleton shops at John Lewis and Waitrose rather than Asda and enjoy the joke.  Tracy Ann Oberman has all the haughtiness of Charles’ demanding and conniving wife.  I particularly liked the actors playing Eugenie and Beatrice and of course, as Fergie, Sophie-Louise Dann’s singing is to die for.

It was so good to be back in the Prince of Wales for the first time since lockdown and laughing, knowing we can soon see Book of Mormon again!  It is no accident that writer Bert Tyler-Moore has writing credits for Spitting Image, The Kumars and Armstrong and Miller.