A Collection of Teapots. Now Spill the Tea.
“Pledge your troth, head to Brighton, and invest in a bulldog.”
Thor’s unfiltered dream
Amid a dusty collection of English teapots and a rear projection screen, Theodore Emory Jones, better known as Thor (Billy Walker), makes his theatrical entrance. Clad in silk pyjamas and brimming with vaulted ambition, he yearns for glory in Dynasty and Dallas. He has come equipped with a Burberry Steamer Trunk packed with more biscuits than in the Peek Frean factory and Harrods Breakfast tea by the bushel.
His phone keeps on ringing and he is hoping for good news from his Agent. If there is no good news, then he will relish the latest gossip. He had hoped to enlist the help of Joan Collins who was a major star to be cast in Dynasty – The Reunion. Like a number of actors in the 1990s, the aim was to have a star backing you. Luck comes in the shape of Joan Collins’s cat who is unwell, Thor Jones, as he is known, then sends a bunch of lilies to Jones’s house with a get well card. Unfortunately, lilies give off an odour that is fatal to cats and he is definitely blocked on Twitter.
Thor’s life unfolds through whirlwind auditions and costume changes; an English butler for Alexis Carrington, a lisping Scottish lighthouse keeper, even an elf in head-to-toe Lycra, all while juggling ad libs, audience interaction, and sporadic narrative derailment.
The Fleabag-style monologue progresses well for its hour show and there are certainly things that will amuse. Billy wrote this show for the Edinburgh Fringe and tried it out in Los Angeles in June 2025. Joan Collins probably needs more work
Malcolm Beckett has been reviewing theatre since 2017
Production Notes
Joan Collins Blocked Me on Twitter
Written and performed by Billy Walker
Cast
Starring:
Billy Walker
Creatives
Information
Running Time: 50 minutes
Booking to 22nd August 2025
Address:
Jade Studio, Greenside
The Royal Society of Edinburgh
22-26 George Street
Edinburgh
EH2 2PQ
Reviewed by Malcolm Beckett at
Jade Studio Greenside@ George Street
at 10.00 pm on Tuesday 12th August